Whiling the hours away…

because I drank Red Bull. Also, because I’m on LSA Anaconda, waiting to take my Humvee down to Kuwait, so it can get loaded on a ship, to make the long trip back home to Colorado.

Anyway, this means that I have time to catch up on my movie watching. I took the chance to watch two movies tonight–Underworld and American Psycho–which I otherwise wouldn’t have seen anytime soon.

I didn’t much like Underworld. It’s basically Romeo and Juliet, done vampire and werewolf style. Except that Romeo and Juliet are still alive at the end. Oh, and it’s not really clear whether or not they end up together…I mean, they walk off, but you don’t see them kiss or anything. And Kate Beckinsale looks reeeeeeallly good in skintight vinyl. Criminally good. There needs to be a sequel, if only so that we can see Kate Beckinsale in vinyl again. And the ending leaves that impression…but, if you think about it, there doesn’t need to be one.

Her boyfriend, Michael, is already the baddest bat in the block, because he’s both vampire and werewolf, so he’s stronger than both. Since he’s a werewolf, presumably he commands the loyalty of the other wolves. Plus he knows where the vampire lair is, and he’s in love with a vampire himself.

So why don’t they just go over to the lair and kick vampire butt? Beats me.

In contrast, I rather liked American Psycho. Based on the shocking novel by Bret Easton Ellis, it tells the tale of Patrick Bateman, who’s a young mergers & acqusitions specialist on Wall Street during the Gilded Eighties.

Trust me, the novel is shocking. It’s extremely graphic in its depictions of violence. I tried reading it, and after the first 15 pages, I just couldn’t–I was getting sick to my stomach. That, and it’s a book by Ellis, whose writing style I’ve always found to be a tad, well, impenetrable.

In contrast, the violence in the movie is artfully done. It’s there–especially in the chainsaw scene–but you don’t get hit over the head with it, and it’s not particularly gory, which I appreciated. I see enough gore here in the ‘Raq; I don’t need to see more of it on celluloid.

It’s not a great movie; but it doesn’t have to be. Two scenes you have to see–Bateman’s deconstruction of Huey Lewis and the News’ “Hip to be Square”, and his confessional scene, in which he’s falling apart. Christian Bale’s absolutely perfect for this role.

All in all, I’d say in my book, it’s a cult movie waiting to happen.

So–Underworld, rent, if you must. But don’t buy it.

American Psycho–buy. Used, preferrably, but you should buy it.

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